The world is starting, thinking, considering getting back to normal. Vaccines numbers and plummeting infection rates are a site for quarantined sore eyes. Our family remains cautiously optimistic, although we will need to be pulling up the caboose on the re-opening train. Now that more family members have gotten or will be getting fully vaccinated, our bubble is getting bigger and more inclusive. I am thrilled about the increase in our family circle, but not nearly as thrilled as Luca. The ability to more engage with grandparents and other family members is pure joy for him and for me to see. Expanding this joy to others and eventually the world at large will be so refreshing.

But not all updates are nearly as exciting. Jackson’s overall health has been poor the last few months. It has not been to the level of hospitalization or immediate alarm, but has nonetheless been “off.” Over several months, he has been periodically inconsolable, puffy, congested, and lethargic, a mixture of symptoms with no clear source. We are now progressing through the gauntlet of medical appointments and tests, determining what is going on and how we can attack it. However, to date, there remain more questions than answers. This situation is similar to that we found ourselves in while in patient a year ago — treating symptoms but not knowing the real cause. It’s a frustrating position for both us and our medical team. I am hopeful the coming weeks reveal a true cause, and, most importantly, a real solution. The current ambiguity hangs over our family. Hopefully it can be eliminated, and Jackson’s bright smile returned.

The situation with Jackson’s health also clouds what our post-quarantine life will be like. Will we be able to travel, joining the mass of Americans freed from their sweatpants sequester? Will we be able to return to consistent in person office work? Will we be able to take Jackson to social events, and not just medical appointments? We will see, we will see.

This post is dedicated to the memory of Colby, a dear friend of Jacksons and his great family. His spirit and the compassion of his family will forever be remembered.